you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I want her autograph on my taint
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
