dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Sorry my hands just texted you
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
