OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
