She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
