yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I have aggressive nipples.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
