I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
