We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
