walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize