I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
