we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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