she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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