wat bout pragnant strippers??
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
