Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
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I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
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gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
How naked do you want me to be?
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