Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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