you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize