Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?

(773): View more from Illinois

Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian

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(616): David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview? (773): Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian http://tfl.nu/r8u6

Replies (4) Good night (2642) Bad night (675)
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(512): View more from Texas

Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.

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(512): Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker. http://tfl.nu/5qzf

Replies (9) Good night (955) Bad night (3029)
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(917): View more from New York City

we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.

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(917): we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender. http://tfl.nu/r1fg

Replies (24) Good night (1994) Bad night (11318)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.

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(973): UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to. http://tfl.nu/mbqt

Replies (26) Good night (5988) Bad night (1374)
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(719): View more from Colorado

I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.

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(719): I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me. http://tfl.nu/o08k

Replies (16) Good night (5461) Bad night (1604)
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(310): View more from California

He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.

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(310): He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls. http://tfl.nu/jh5k

Replies (17) Good night (848) Bad night (3706)
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(518): View more from New York

I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.

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(518): I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son. http://tfl.nu/kmmn

Replies (5) Good night (4770) Bad night (1117)
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(303): View more from Colorado

I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep

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(303): I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep http://tfl.nu/pnlq

Replies (21) Good night (1486) Bad night (4875)
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(845): View more from New York

Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me

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(845): Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me http://tfl.nu/lgfh

Replies (9) Good night (3279) Bad night (1006)
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(952): View more from Minnesota

like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face

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(952): like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face http://tfl.nu/ozvq

Replies (11) Good night (891) Bad night (1978)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now

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(508): Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now http://tfl.nu/n0um

Replies (7) Good night (2687) Bad night (630)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...

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(267): Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket... http://tfl.nu/72dv

Replies (4) Good night (1013) Bad night (525)
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(706): View more from Georgia

It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me

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(706): It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me http://tfl.nu/2th9

Replies (0) Good night (547) Bad night (330)
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(317): View more from Indiana

I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given

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(317): I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given http://tfl.nu/n5qa

Replies (2) Good night (752) Bad night (468)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.

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(336): I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting. http://tfl.nu/ebs4

Replies (1) Good night (428) Bad night (127)

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