he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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