she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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