last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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