At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize