Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
