Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
