Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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