Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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