...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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