That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
