I'm jealous of your bromance
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
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