shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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