i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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