So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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