I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
