In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize