I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
