She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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