Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
