Is that why you're texting me
what ever happened to devon sawa?
i'm really worried about him.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth