He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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