woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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