I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
