we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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