He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now