Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize