Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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