Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
