I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He's a Shit stain on my heart
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize