No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
