im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
His hands were made for my vagina.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
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He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
My liver just had a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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