It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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