I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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