Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize