new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!